How are you?

When we greet people, we ask, “How are you?” They usually respond with a friendly “fine” or “good” and then get on to the next part of the conversation. Since I have been diagnosed with Parkinson’s, the greeting has changed to “How are you doing?” A small difference in the choice of words, but a big difference to me. I know what they are really asking is how is my Parkinson’s and how am I dealing with it. My answer surprises and confuses them. I respond, “I am great.” They are not sure what to say next. 

You see I have learned by changing the tape in my head from a negative one to a positive one, I can encourage good feelings. I keep the Parkinson’s in perspective and think of my overall physical and mental health which are in fact, great. Of course, there are days when “great” just does not work, especially if I had little sleep and feeling very tired. Then I answer,  “it’s not my best day.” It is truthful and says a lot. I know that as soon as I can get more rest, I will be back to feeling great again.

Why all the hoopla about a simple question, “How are you doing?” Largely because how you answer this inquiry effects the rest of the conversation and your overall feelings. If you tell yourself each day that you are sick and disabled, you begin to live up to that role. If you tell yourself you are doing well despite the disease, you take on a new role that leads to feelings of health and happiness. Try it next time you are out and about and someone asks, “How are  you?” You may surprise yourself and the other person when you answer, “Great, and you?”