Wow. It will be 12 years this spring since I was diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease. What a journey it has been including the many ups and downs that I have experienced. The downs of having a chronic neurological disease seem apparent: tremors, falls, lack of smell, unable to do gross motor skills and fine motor skills, walking and so on and so on.
Oh yes, along with the physical issues, Parkinson’s Disease also presents with many mental and emotional ones. Feelings of depression, hopelessness, loneliness and “different” are a few on the spectrum that come for a day, a week or longer..
NOW enough of the downs!!!!! What about the ups????? Yes, the ups! When I was first diagnosed I was 58 years old and thought my life will never be the same. I was right, it has changed drastically, but what I did not account for was the positive aspects of having a chronic condition. Let me explain…..
*I do enjoy the simple things more because I have had to slow down and literally stop and smell the roses…..and all nature has to show us when we take the time to look. Yesterday, a very close friend and I were chatting and I asked her what is she doing for fun in her life. She said, “simple things” and then gave the example of enjoying a good movie on the sofa with her husband and a cuddly blanket. I understood immediately what she was saying.
*I do appreciate the days when I see lots of my friends at our local yacht club or our book club or during game days. We laugh, share updates and for awhile my health is not the focus of our chats. I am a normal person, not a Parkinson’s patient.
*I love my lounge days. These are days when my energy level is low and my lounge pants and sweatshirt feel so cozy and warm. After a few of the busy days, I need and want a down-day. My niece and I have recognized these days for me as PJs days. We both understand that it does not mean my condition is worse, just the need to know when to take it easy.
*Another plus..I love my updated wardrobe even though it is a total change from days gone by when I worked, presented at conferences and attended nice events. Of course, much of the wardrobe changes occurred when I retired, but I am specifically referring to the Parkinson-friendly clothes. I learned to find outfits with no zippers, buttons or snaps. I found that decreased movement ability does not equal frumpy! Today my pants pull up, my sweaters pull over and shoes slip on! Occasionally, I will get daring and try a sport bra, a dress with a back zipper or shoes with heels. Then I will laugh at what I must look like trying to maneuver these and eventually call for a sale’s lady to help!
*One last example, I have found that having Parkinson’s has actually strengthen my senses of faith, hope and charity. Faith because I truly believe that God is with me each step (especially the shaky ones) along the path. Hope because I see with each passing year, Parkinson’s does not define me, only if I let it. I am not a sick person. I am someone with a disease that will not change who I am, simply how I go about things. (I get out of a car one foot then the other….slowly and precisely, I do not climb on chairs, steps stools, or any other type of elevation, and I do not ride bike cycles or other moving cycles.) However, I do hope to continue to drive when I can, walk when I can and even play with Sophie (my yellow lab puppy) when I can for as long as I can.
*Finally, having Parkinson’s has made me a kinder, gentler person. I am more charitable with all people. I give them the benefit of doubt in situations where they are rude or cranky. I remind myself that none of us truly knows what others are going through in their lives. Having Parkinson’s would not be something I would have wanted for myself, yet on the other hand, it could be so much worse and for many it is.
When I take a look at my dozen years with Parkinson’s, I CHOOSE not to be bitter for what it has taken from me, but blessed for all I have.
Illustration: Pinerest